How to Make a Wedding Guest List: A Step-by-Step Guide
How to Make a Wedding Guest List: A Step-by-Step Guide
Imagine your ideal rustic rural wedding, replete with abundant flowers, delicious canapés, and the beaming smiles of your closest friends.
A well-curated guest list elevates an already fantastic wedding to an unforgettable occasion. However, how do you choose which loved ones, close friends, and significant others to invite to your wedding?
This is our guide to help you finalize a guest list that fulfils your wedding vision, including everything from venue capacity to budget.
What is the average guest list for a wedding?
According to The Knot's annual Real Weddings Study, the average wedding size in 2022 was 117 attendees, though this number can vary yearly. Examining the same survey in greater detail reveals that over 50% of the participants invited 100 or more guests. In contrast, destination weddings often feature fewer guests—about 80 people for domestic events—than other types of weddings.
Do these figures indicate the number of guests you should invite to your wedding? Not at all! An average is just that—many couples choose to have fewer or many more guests at their weddings. Consider every aspect and choose the ideal guest list size based on your personality, geography, and financial constraints.
How do I manage my wedding guest list?
After you've started organizing your wedding, it's time to manage your guest list. You'll finally have a carefully chosen list that guarantees your wedding is flawless, starting with the big picture.
How do I make a list of people to invite to my wedding?
A joint endeavour, your wedding honours the partnership between you and your spouse. As you sit down with your partner, make a list of potential guests by writing down who you think should be invited. As you eventually work through a final invite count, creating a master list, spreadsheet, or even index cards can help you filter through the options because visualization is helpful.
Do you count the bride and groom in the guest list?
You and your spouse should be invited, even though you don't need to send each other an official invitation. As the wedding date approaches, you'll need to provide the caterer and/or venue with a final headcount. Remember to list your meal options if you're also having a plated supper!
Compromise is key
Not only do you and your spouse probably have a list of mutual acquaintances, but you may also wish to add particular individuals from each side of your relationship. Decide how much of each guest's percentage you are allowed to have. To avoid the wedding feeling one-sided, think about enabling your spouse to have more friends and acquaintances if, for example, you have a large family and they have a smaller one.
Depending on the parent's involvement, you might also need to give them a spot on the guest list. They might cherish other close ties, such as a group of lifelong friends who go to each other's children's weddings. You have the last say in who gets invited but be prepared to make some concessions to appease everyone.
How to decide who to invite to your wedding
Consider creating your guest list for your wedding like you would a flavorful soup. To finish the recipe, you must determine the ideal ingredient-to-spice ratio. You blend elements from the bride's and groom's families to create the perfect wedding entertainment.
After you've gathered as many names as you, your partner, or your parents would want to have on your wedding day guest list, apply these guidelines to make it manageable and meet your wedding requirements.
Use your budget as a guide.
Budgetary concerns must be the most critical factor when determining a final count. At this stage of the planning process, you should have a notion of the per-head cost because you have probably already negotiated prices with the venue and providers. Recognize your numbers and avoid exceeding your permitted budget for the whole cost.
Having more visitors may also result in increased costs elsewhere. Depending on what you provide, this could involve additional rental furniture, such as chairs, tables, place settings, and perhaps more décor and table centrepieces.
Venue capacity limitations
Alternatively, your venue may have a limit capacity that they are legally prohibited from exceeding, even if your guest list isn't breaking the bank. You may have to remove some people from the list, but in the end, you'll have the ideal number of guests for your wedding.
For instance, Maria and Dylan, Flowersarch's couple, decided on a charming micro-wedding cruise that could only accommodate 50 guests, including the ship's staff and themselves. Their wedding day felt even more memorable because of their closeness and ability to interact with each guest, even if having a set number of guests required making some difficult decisions.
Another rule of thumb for wedding guest list
Apart from exogenous factors such as financial constraints and vendor limitations, it is incumbent upon you and your collaborator to choose a manageable guest list. Other considerations for wedding guest lists include the following:
PRIORITIZE YOUR LOVED ONES
Who comes to mind as a crucial component of your wedding day when you close your eyes and visualize it? Your vows will probably be seen by a few non-negotiable family members and lifelong friends, except for tiny elopements and courthouse weddings.
INCLUDE YOUR WEDDING PARTY IN THE COUNT
Even if your groomsmen and bridesmaids have already committed, remember that they (as well as their partners) should be included in your final guest count.
RECIPROCAL INVITATIONS
You may feel obligated to extend an invitation to the couple that hosted you on their special day because you were a prior guest. It is their turn to celebrate you, so by all means, make including the other couples a priority if they continue to play a significant role in your life.
However, feel free to invite someone only if you attended their wedding. Friendships might sometimes drift away, and wedding reception capacities can differ significantly. Even though they may have had hundreds of guests, your small wedding and an extensive list of relatives may mean they don't cut. When you make the decision, use your best judgment.
DO YOU NEED TO INVITE WORK COLLEAGUES OR SUPERVISORS?
Some people must maintain their work and home lives apart. Others find that their coworkers become close friends who stick together even after they stop working together. If you're having a small-scale wedding, most colleagues will completely understand if you'd instead share pictures and enjoy a celebration drink when you get back.
NEIGHBORS, ACQUAINTANCES, AND FAMILY FRIENDS
You may invite everyone you know during your initial brainstorming session, and generally, for a good reason. When you start arranging, people like godparents, pleasant neighbours, and friends from extracurricular activities may come up.
Narrow down your wedding party guest list.
After you've thrown all the names of possible guests into the proverbial hat, reduce the number of probable attendees on your list to a manageable amount.
TRY A RANKING SYSTEM FOR YOUR WEDDING GUEST LIST
Forming groupings out of potential guests might occasionally be helpful when you're beginning to weed through the list. Consider creating distinct piles or columns for "only if there's room," maybes, and necessities.
Certain visitors, such as parents, siblings, and closest friends, may not be negotiable. You can add more people to your "maybe" list, such as coworkers, gym pals, or your great aunt, who you've only met once or twice. Make space for the guests you must have at your wedding, then add more until your maximum number of guests is reached.
WHO GETS A PLUS ONE?
In general, guests should be permitted to bring a guest if they are in a committed relationship or have a live-in partner on the wedding invitation. You can exercise discretion with others, such as friends who would feel more at ease with an acquaintance going with them.
KID-FRIENDLY OR CHILD-FREE?
Although children can bring an added layer of sweetness and excitement to your wedding day, remember that they can quickly increase the number of guests, particularly if you have many darling nieces and nephews.
It's acceptable to imagine a more sophisticated evening for your wedding! But if you're asking for a child-free wedding, be ready for some of your guests to turn down the invitation if they can't afford to travel for a destination wedding or cannot find childcare.
HOW FAR OUTSIDE YOUR CIRCLE SHOULD YOU GO?
Consider the prospective guest's role in your life and whether you can envision them joining your social circle in the future. You'll meet guests who are more distant family relatives or people you haven't spoken to in a long time as you move farther out in your circle. When it comes time to reduce the number of guests on your list, begin at the outermost point of your circle and work your way in.
BE READY TO MAKE HARD CHOICES FOR THE WEDDING YOU WANT
Emily and Jackson, Flowersarch's pair, provide some wise counsel: when it comes to wedding planning, focus first on the location and guest list. With only six months to organize, plan, send out invites, and construct a guest list for their enchanting terracotta-hued vineyard wedding, they went all out.
"You need to figure out who you want to invite, and if you have to cut people, who you're willing to cut to get the wedding that you want," advises Emily, "especially if your guest list is 500 and your venue can only hold 250."
Sending the wedding invites
The sooner you send your guests a save-the-date or formal invitation, the more likely they will be able to rearrange their calendars to prioritize your wedding. This is advantageous for both the visitors and you because, when you know well in advance who will be there, you'll have plenty of time to arrange for meals, seats, and other details.
Word your invitations carefully.
If you want to be confident that your number of attendees is accurate, ensure your invites are worded precisely so there is no room for interpretation. Provide explicit names and, if available, the guest's preferred name. Additionally, make note of any rules you may have in advance, such as a child-free reception or a "only kids over a certain age are welcome" policy.
Organize your guest list for wedding RSVPs.
Some critical information to think about for a master guest list that can help you stay organized, facilitate seating arrangements, and make it simple to communicate details with vendors:
- Complete names of visitors, together with any designated plus ones
- Favourite appellations or monikers
- Meal choices
- dietary limitations
- connection to the married pair (bride, groom, parents, etc.)
Be ready with a wedding guest B-list
If you have allowed yourself enough time to RSVP, you can access the B-list to fill any voids left by rejected attendees. Additionally, if you've kept all of your information structured, adding new items to the master list will be simple and only require a fast switch.
What percentage of wedding guests will attend?
Approximately 80% of those who were invited should show up. The number of guests who cannot attend your special day may vary depending on the day of the week and season. Some of these will affect the total number of guests you have:
Local vs out-of-town guests
When attending your wedding, friends and family who live far away must make many more arrangements. These include scheduling time off from work, making travel arrangements, booking a hotel or Airbnb, and obtaining childcare for small children or pets. Due to the comfort of being close to home, guests who reside in the area are more likely to come.
The day of the week
Even while a Wednesday wedding could save you a ton of money, bear in mind that fewer guests could be able to attend the ceremony. Having a wedding date outside of a usual weekend occasion means your percentage of attending guests is lower than the average 85% due to hectic work schedules, limited paid time off, and rising travel costs.
Holidays and other seasonal wedding dates
In addition to guaranteed time off from work and school, holiday weekends may result in higher travel and lodging expenses. Although there are advantages to holiday weddings, people frequently have other commitments.
For instance, Flowersarch's pair Abby and Nick celebrated their long Memorial weekend in a vineyard with a vintage feel, complete with sunflower and lavender décor. On the big day, this couple's initial guest list of 175 shrunk to a little over 140, which they claim worked out perfectly for their event.
Finalize your wedding guest list and focus on the fun stuff.
Once your guest list is under control, you can focus your wedding planning efforts on the details—the décor!
Discover exquisitely chosen colour schemes in our assortment of designer artificial flowers, sure to wow your wedding guests.